Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Another C

I have to come to terms with it - I am blessed to have gotten pregnant twice, to have had relatively smooth and trouble free pregnancies (with no morning sickness at all), to have incubated two beautiful and healthy babies and to have complications free deliveries and after birth recoveries.  I was not meant though..to deliver the babies vaginally.  Yes, my second.. Ashraf, was also delivered via emergency C-section.  The emergency being that, I did not originally opt to have the C-section and it was only prepared once our decision was made late that day.

Ashraf's original estimated due date was on the 8th July.  I was hoping if he decided to make his entrance on the 7th, that date is very nice also.. 7/7/11 :) But the 7th and the 8th came and went and still no sign of baby wanting to come out.  As per last time with Yasmin, doc said we'd wait for one week and then if nothing happened, we'd have to decide between going for induction or C-sec.

I did not want either option.  I knew that contractions and labour pains were stronger with induction and as the doctor pointed out, if it didn't work then we'd have to resort to the C-sec operation anyway.  I did not want the C-sec because I knew that the pain and recovery after were higher.  And besides, even though it's become the norm where some mothers opt to have it... it's still a major surgery bah!  There's also the fact that if your first and second deliveries are via c-section, your future third has to be done via c-section as well. (Is it a fact? I haven't researched and read about it yet..) Doc also mentioned (in passing, like it was no big deal..) that some mothers would opt to be 'ikat' after the third c-section.  Very good reasons for me to not want to have it!  I was determined that I could deliver 'normally' and determined to use all the options and alternatives I could to induce delivery naturally.

I walked a lot.  The weekend before we even went to Gaya Street market on Sunday morning, we parked near Tong Hing and walked the entire market from end to end.  I did squats. And kegels. Pelvic tilts, cat/cow poses and hip opener exercises.  I read up about accupressure and accupressure points to induce labour.  Pressed and massage those points until it was quite sore.  I did visualisation exercises - seeing and believing my cervics opening on its own.  I drank and bathed air akar fatimah/selusuh which mom-in-law brought back from Mekah, which is said to help smoothen labour.  I drank coconut juice - nyamannn sekali! (This drink which usually gave me migraines, alhamdulillah..tidak pula migrain this time).  Recite doa Nabi Yunus as much as I remember.  Recite my personal doa hoping for the best.

Alas, the one week came and went by.  No signs. Baby was too comfy in the womb :) A friend smsed me saying that doctors are all to quick to recommend induction and c-sections, the baby is still developing and preparing for the birth and will come out when the time is right.  I believed her so.  But who am I to go against the doctor's expert and experienced advice?

And so, on the 14th, it was decided for me to go in to be induced.  I was still wishing and hoping for the best.  I could still deliver normally after being induced. I could. I could. I could?  Induced (pumped up with drugs!) at around 9am, lay in the bed and wait.  Well, a lot of other things happened before and in between but I'll spare you the details! Once the two hours laying down period was over, I got up and walked around the room, did my squats, etc.  Minum air akar fatimah. Periodic contractions started but still bearable for me to move around.  Doc said he'd be back in the afternoon to check on me.  He came back at around 4pm!  And I was so hoping for some good (opening) news!

Very much disappointed though when he told me that my cervics still hadn't opened at all.  At all?  Are you kidding me - I thought? He laid down our options. We could do another round of induction but chances it will work were not high.  And we'd have to wait again.  Prolonging the labour.  The other only option was the c-section. *Sigh*  Hubby and I discussed it through.. though I never like to say there was no other choice - it was exactly the predicament we were in.  There was no other choice then and there.  A stroke of dejavu hit.  It was the same scenario with Yasmin's birth 5+ years ago.  So, long story short.. c-section it was.

At 6.05pm our little baby boy was born.

Later, a group of mommies told me.. it doesn't matter how baby was born, what matters is that I did what I could and that I safely delivered the baby and to now enjoy every precious moment with him.  True. *Heartwarmed*

I remember thinking, I would not want to go through it again - the freezing cold operation theatre ( I was shivering like mad), the fear of something going wrong, the pain after.  But then again... looking at the darling little boy, who knows.. I could endure one more time probably..  

xoxo